Islam's Unique Attitude Towards Women

Unlike other popular beliefs, Islam does not blame Hawa AS alone for the First Sin. The Qur'an makes it clear that both she and her husband - the Prophet Adam AS were tempted, both of them sinned and Allah Ta'ala's pardon was granted to both of them after their repentance. They were addressed by Allah Ta'ala jointly.

Allah Ta'ala eloquently states in the Qur'an:

"O Mankind! Keep your duty to your Lord who created you from a single person, and created of like nature his mate, and from their twain scattered (like seeds) a multitude of men and women." (Surah An-Nisaa: Ayat 1)

Allah Ta'ala further states in the Qur'an:

" He (Allah) it is who did create you from a single soul and therefrom did create his mate, that he might dwell with her (in love)..."

The humanity of woman is declared in these decrees. She is not a great temptress, nor is she a slave and some chattel created for the amusement to be used and abused by men.

The crux of the law of Shari'ah is to preserve the family. The emphasis in Islam is to move away from the materialistic life to one which is guided towards having functional individuals, families and communities. Thus the intelligent one is the one who disciplines himself / herself in order to avoid having dysfunctional families and as a result dysfunctional communities and society.

The word Islam is derived from the Arabic root "salam" which means among other things - peace, purity, submission and obedience. In the religious sense the word Islam means submission to the Will of Allah and obedience to Allah's Laws.

A Muslim is one who obeys, fully submits to, and worships Allah alone and bears testimony that Muhammad SAW was Allah's last Prophet and Messenger. Muslims never worshipped Muhammad SAW or any human being. Muslims believe in all the Prophets of Allah without any discrimination.


THE MUSLIM WOMAN THROUGHOUT HER STAGES IN LIFE

As a Daughter

In pagan Arabia, little girls were considered a burden and a disgrace, so they were buried alive by their fathers.

With the advent of Islam, Nabi SAW is reported to have said:

"Whosoever has a daughter and he does not bury her alive, does not insult her, does not favour his son over her, Allah will enter him into Paradise."

When a girl is born, it is a sign of honour for the parents. She brings with her blessings into the home and Allah Ta'ala's rahmat descends upon the family.

It is mentioned in a hadith that Nabi SAW said:

"When a female child is born, Allah Ta'ala sends His angels to that house. They come to the dwellers of the house and pray that peace may be upon them, The angels then cover the newly born girl in the shadow of their wings and caressing the head of the baby with their hands they say that, this is a weak and frail person, whoever will bear the responsibility of cherishing her will go on having the blessing of Allah Ta'ala as long as that person remains alive." (Al-Mujam-al-Saghir li Tabrani)

The Prophet Muhammad SAW also stated:

"Whosoever maintains two girls until they attain maturity, he and I will come on the Day of Judgement like this, (the Prophet Muhammad SAW hereby joined his two fingers held together)." (Sahih Muslim)

The pursuit of education and knowledge was made incumbent on every Muslim male and female more than one thousand four hundred years ago.

Every girl has a right to education and she is allowed to seek knowledge which will benefit her in the Hereafter as well as in this world. She is expected to make a positive contribution to society by applying her skills in the service of her family and society.

Nabi Muhammad SAW said:

"Seeking knowledge is mandatory for every Muslim." (Bayhaqi)


As a Wife

Allah Ta'ala has created men and women as company for one another, so that they can live in peace and tranquility. It will be found that men and women are jointly addressed in the Qur'an.

The Holy Qur'an states:

"And among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your hearts. Undoubtedly in these are signs for those who reflect." (Surah 31: Ayat 21)

Besides all other provisions for her protection at the time of marriage, it has been decreed that the woman has full the right to her marriage gift which is presented to her by her husband. It is included in the nuptial contract, and that such ownership does not transfer to her husband or her father.

Among the aims of marriage is the provision of solace, comfort, peace and rest, for both of them. Both of them are entitled to each other's companionship and partnership. The husband has no right in Shari'ah to impose his whims and fancies on her. Although most wives cook and take care of domestic chores, she is not by default in Shari'ah - compelled to wash clothes or cook food for the household.

In fact, A'ishah RA reported that Nabi SAW helped his wives in domestic chores. He used to mend his shoes, sew his clothes, and work in his house just as any of you works in his own house.

The rights and responsibilities of a woman are equal to those of a man but they are not necessarily identical with them. This difference is understandable because men and women are not identical but they are created equals. Islam thus takes into due consideration, acknowledges her, and recognises her independent personality.

A woman is not less important than a man. She has to be treated equally, with justice and fairness. However, Allah Ta'ala has conferred the responsibility of leadership within this union to the husband.

The Qur'an states:

"And they (women) have rights similar to those (of men) over them, and men are a degree above them."

The leadership role does not mean the husband's dictatorship over his wife, rather it emphasises the importance of consultation, mutual agreement and taking counsel in making family decisions.

Economically, a wife does not have to compete in the market place for her upkeep. In return for the solace she provides to her husband, the Shari'ah has commanded the husband to compulsorily fulfil her material and spiritual needs. He cannot order her to earn a living nor order her to assist in his business.

The husband is encouraged to deal leniently and kindly with his wife when disputes or differences arise.

Nabi SAW is reported to have said:

"The most perfect Believers are the ones who are best in conduct, and the best of you are those who are best to their wives." (Ahmad, Tirmidhi)

Verbal, physical, financial and emotional abuse of a wife is totally out of keeping of a Muslim man's character. These actions are considered as disgraceful cowardice and he will be accountable for his cowardly treatment against his wife in the hereafter. He has to remember that his wife is not his property, she is Allah Ta'ala's property and was given to him by Allah Ta'ala as a gift, to be treasured, respected and cherished.

Allah SWT mentions in the Qur'an:

"Deal with women correctly and with kindness. If then, you dislike them, then it is possible that you dislike something in which Allah has created abundance of goodness therein." (Surah An-Nisaa: Ayat 19)

Just as a husband finds some characteristics disagreeable, he will find other characteristics agreeable. He is guided to seek and highlight the good in his wife.

As the woman's right to decide about her marriage is recognized, so also is her right to seek an end for an unsuccessful marriage is recognised.

Divorce is detested by Allah Ta'ala even though it has been made lawful by Him. It is the permissible thing most hated by Allah SWT.

The Prophet Muhammad SAW is reported to have said:

"The lawful thing which Allah hates most is divorce." (Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud, Ibn Majah)

This is because it disrupts the stability of the family and rocks the family system.

Certain steps and waiting periods should be observed by men and women seeking divorce. A woman can bring her request for a divorce before a Qadhi (Muslim judge) who will grant her a divorce by examining the circumstances.

Marriage in Islam is considered to fulfill five fundamental functions.

01. Protective and supportive function:

Marriage serves as an absorber and protector from the pressures of the over-bearing outside world. The ability to understand, sympathise, and support is a critical function of the spouses. It is within the ambit of a nurturing, loving and secure home life that marital harmony thrives and by extension a functional family and community.


02. Recreational function:

Nabi Muhammad SAW played and competed in running with his wife A'ishah RA. Leisure activities within the family group are encouraged, as the family that plays together stays together.


03. Social function:

Marriage unites two families and the couple has to accord respect to family members and foster ties with both sides of the family.

Nabi Muhammad SAW is reported to have said:

"Whosoever desires that sustenance be expanded for him and his life be prolonged, let him foster ties with the family."

The children learn to interact with their elders and peers. The virtues of respect, caring, sharing and reciprocating love for the pleasure of Allah Ta'ala are cultivated.


04. Educational function:

The Prophet Muhammad SAW is reported to have said:

"Nobody shall meet Allah Ta'ala with a sin greater than that of having left his family in ignorance." ( Daylami)

Ibn Atta RA said:

"A'ishah RA was among all the people, the one who had most knowledge of Fiqh, the one who was the most educated, and compared to those who surround her, the one whose judgement was the best."

The companions of A'ishah RA called her - "Bahrul Uluum", the ocean of knowledge. This was due to the vast amount of knowledge she gained from her husband.

05. Religious function:

A religious atmosphere within the home helps to develop humility and a sense of accountability for all our actions. When the couple mutually create this atmosphere, they then personify the following verse of the Holy Qur'an:

"Verily for all men and women who have surrendered themselves to Allah, all believing men and women, all pious men and women, all honest men and women, all patient men and women, all humble men and women, all accountable men and women, all fasting men and women, all chaste men and women who remember Allah increasingly; Allah has prepared forgiveness and a great reward." (Surah 33: Ayat 35)


Nabi Muhammad SAW has said:

"This world (and all it's contents) are but perishable commodities, the best of all perishable commodities is a pious wife."

Sex within the marriage is not mere sexual gratification; it is an act of charity.

Nabi Muhammad SAW said:

"In the sexual act of each of you there is Sadaqah."

The Companions RA asked:

"O Messenger of Allah! When one of us fulfills his sexual desires, he will be given a reward for it?"

He (SAW) replied:

"Do you not think that if he were to act upon it unlawfully, he would be sinning? Likewise, if he acts upon it lawfully, he will be rewarded." (Muslim)

The husband is reminded that he should handle their sexual relationship with care, warmth, and comfort and not treat his wife as a doormat who can be dispensed with according to his own selfish desires. He should seek mutual bliss, satisfaction and fulfillment with her.


As a Mother

A woman is a full and equal partner of man in the procreation of mankind. Her role is no less vital than his.

It is mentioned in one Hadith that Nabi SAW said:

"Does it not please you ( O Women!) that when you conceive from your husbands whilst he is pleased with you, then that woman will receive such reward equal to that of a fasting person in the path of Allah and spending the night in Ibadah. When her labour pains commence, the inhabitants of the earth and the sky are unaware of the stores of comfort that are prepared for her. When she delivers and breast feeds her child, then she will be granted a reward for every gulp of milk; and if she had to remain awake during the night for the sake of her child, she will receive the reward of emancipating seventy slaves in the path of Allah.

Do you know who these women are? They are pious, upright, delicately natured but yet are obedient to their husbands and not ungrateful to them."

Another Hadith states the Prophet Muhammad SAW as saying:

"A woman from her pregnancy till the time of weaning her child is like one protecting the boundaries of the Islamic state. If she passes away during this period, she attains the reward of martyrdom." (Shahidah)

The mother is the first seat of learning for her children. It is here, in the warmth of her love and care that the child learns about Allah Ta'ala, Nabi SAW, about honesty, fairness, justice, treatment of strangers, the poor, the helpless, etc. The child's socialisation process is not just geared towards filling his/ her head with information and fairy tales. The child learns his/ her responsibilities as a Muslim from an early age from the mother who is truly the centre of the child's universe at that stage.

The Qur'an has special recommendations for the good treatment of both parents.

Due to the great sacrifices she makes in bearing her children, spending sleepless nights watching over them when they are ill, virtually turning her day into night for their comfort and for rearing them with so much love and attention, the mother is given precedence and a higher status than the father.

A famous saying of Nabi SAW is:

"Paradise is at the feet of your mother."

A man came to Nabi SAW asking:

"O Messenger of Allah, who among the people is the most worthy of my good company?"

Nabi SAW said:

"Your mother."

The man then asked:

"Who else?"

Nabi SAW replied:

"Your mother."

The man then asked again:

"Then who else?"

Nabi SAW said:

"Your mother."

The man then asked:

"Who else?"

Only then did he get the answer:

"Your father."


THE MUSLIM WOMAN ECONOMIC STATUS

Islamic Law fully acknowledged the woman's right to her money, real estate or other property over one thousand, four hundred years ago. This right undergoes no change whether she is single or married. She retains her full right to buy, sell, mortgage or lease any or all of her properties. Her right to her properties applies even if she acquires them after her marriage. She is not regarded as a minor simply because she is a woman.

Not many of us know that in the Western world it was not until 1938 that the French Law was amended so as to recognise the eligibility of women to contract. A married woman was however, still required to secure her husband's permission before she could dispense with her private property.

In Islam, a woman is guaranteed her share of inheritance. Before Islam, she was not only deprived of that share but was herself a "transferable property" to be inherited by man. Whether she is a wife or mother, a sister or daughter, she receives a certain share of the diseased kin's property. This share depends on her degree of relationship to the diseased and the number of heirs. She cannot be disinherited. Even if the diseased wishes to deprive her by making a will to other relations, or, in favour of some cause, the Law will not allow him to do so. Her share of inheritance is completely hers, her father and husband can make no claim on it whatsoever.

As far as the woman's right to seek employment is concerned, it should be remembered that Islam regards her role in society as a mother and wife as the most sacred and an essential one, as she largely "shapes the future of nations". This vital and noble role cannot by any means be fulfilled by maids and babysitters which is customary in this day and age, even for Muslims.

A Muslim man is fully responsible for the maintenance of his wife, his children, in some cases his needy relatives, especially the females. Her husband's responsibility is neither waived nor reduced because of his wife's wealth or because of her access to any personal income gained from rent, work or profit.

Just as her possessions do not transfer to her husband after she marries him, she is not obliged to spend her wealth on her family. She was also given the choice of keeping her maiden surname over fourteen hundred years ago.

She is financially secure and provided for.

If she is a wife, her husband is the provider.

If she is a mother, it is the son who is the provider.

If she is a daughter, her father is the provider.

If she is sister, it is the brother who is the provider, etc.

The Noble Status of Women in Islam

Women In The Past

Prior to Islam, a woman's status in the sight of all nations of the World was nothing more than the value of household goods. They were treated with much disrespect. They were bought and sold. They had no choice in the matters of marriage; and they had to silently accept the highest bidder. They never inherited, even from their close relatives. In fact, she herself would become an item of distribution just like any other commodity of inheritance in a descendant's estate. Women were regarded merely as properties and possessions of men. Even in religious matters women were given no status by men, for they were not considered to be worthy of prayer or fit to be counted as human.

Such was the conditions of societies in the past, that it was considered accepted and permissible for men to bury their daughters alive, and this heartless act of inhumanity was then regarded as an act of protecting honour and respect.

It was also generally accepted that if a lady was murdered then her murderer could not be punished in any way. Neither was he to be killed in retaliation, nor was he to pay blood money. According to many religions too, when a man dies, his wife has to kill herself too.


Women According to the Prophet Muhammad SAW

The Noble Prophet Muhammad SAW, with Divine guidance taught mankind the true value of humanity. From the darkness and polytheism into the light and monotheism.

The Prophet Muhammad SAW enforced justice, thus - making it obligatory for men to fulfill the rights of women. Just as it is necessary for women to fulfill the rights of men. The Prophet Muhammad SAW freed women from the slavery of man. A woman was granted the ownership of her life and property. No person has the right to use her wealth without her permission. Just as males are entitled to their share in the estate of their relatives, females also have their own rights. To spend upon one's wife and to keep them happy within the boundaries of Islam is regarded as an act of worship.

The blessed Prophet SAW has stated:

"To have intercourse with one's wife is charity and a means of reward."

The Sahabah RA enquired:

"O, Prophet ? Is there a reward for fulfilling desires also?"

The Holy Prophet SAW replied:

"Had he fulfilled his desires in the wrong place would he not have sinned?"

The Sahabah RA answered:

"Yes."

Then the Prophet SAW said:

"In order to safeguard oneself from sin, one will undoubtedly attain reward."


Depriving Women of Their Biggest Right

To deprive a woman of her rights is undoubtedly a severe oppression, which Islam has wiped out by means of very just and moderate laws. The so-called lifestyle of women is also a form of injustice to give them a "free right" depriving them of their true right, to be guided and protected by men i.e. their husbands or fathers.


Parents' Indoctrination of Their Daughters

Unfortunately, nowadays, the parents themselves encourage their daughters to go and earn their own livelihood and when things go wrong they question themselves as to how the situation came about. They will cry for months on end little knowing that they themselves sent their daughters to the Fire. How is it that they do not know that the livelihood obtained from the menfolk working is enough to reasonably sustain the family. People complain and give lame excuses of not having enough money, which "forces" them to send their womenfolk to work. The fact is - what is longed for are the unnecessary extras in life, which will undoubtedly be questioned and reckoned on the Day of Judgement. In such issues, the husbands and fathers will be accountable.


Revelation in the Qur'an Regarding Women

Allah states in the Qur'an:

"And stay in your houses and do not display yourselves like that of the time of ignorance." (Surah Al-Ahzaab)

And at another place in the Qur'an Allah SWT orders:

"And tell the believing women to lower their gazes (from forbidden things) and protect their private parts and not to show off their adornments, (except) only that which is apparent." (Surah An-Nur)

In Surah Al-Baqarah Allah SWT has declared:

"And the men have superiority over the women."

Many women who are activists of "women's rights" do not understand the true context of this Ayat. This ayat infact explains the right of women to be protected by their husbands and menfolk. In other words, men are their guardian and governors. The difference could be likened to the necessity of appointing a captain in a football team, where the captain is subjected to the same rules and privileges of his team mates. But a greater responsibility and a higher rank has been conferred upon him in order to maintain a proper system for the smooth running of the team. This analogy provides a clear-cut example for comprehension.


Women In Today's Modern Society

During the pre-Islamic era, women were treated like animals and household goods. Unfortunately today the modern world has ushered in a second period of ignorance.

Some of the ill effects created by removing women from under the guardianship and authority of men are:

a) The respect for women has been lost.

b) Marked increase in divorce rates.

c) Neglect of children.

d) Children not being educated and trained in an Islamic way.

e) Jobs of male personnel being taken by females, resulting in injuries (e.g. pregnant women ordered to operate heavy items at work); and the increase of unemployment.

f) Increase in the instances of rape and sexual abuse.

g) The rise in the unemployment amongst males leads to loafing idleness which encourages alcoholism, drug abuse, rape, murder, robbery and a host of other social evils.

All this in the name of "liberation". Truly - it is not worth it.

Nowadays, there are evil notions misrepresenting the status of the rank of women in Islam. This information is given by people who consider women in Islam to be prisoners who have no rights and is always under the domination of man. The importance given to a woman can be deduced from the following Hadith:

The Holy Prophet SAW has stated:

"The best amongst you is the one who is the best towards his wife." (Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah, Dasimi)

On another occasion the Prophet SAW stated:

"Paradise lies under the feet of mothers." (Bukhari)


On another occasion the Prophet Muhammad SAW was questioned by one of his Companions RA:

"Who deserves the best care from me?"

The Prophet SAW replied:

"Your mother."

The Prophet SAW repeated this three times.
When he was asked the fourth time he replied:

"Your father and your near relatives." (Imam Bukhari's Adab-ul-Mufrad)

A Complaint of a Woman

Once a lady approached Saiyidina Umar ibn Khattab RA during his Caliphate.

She said to him:

"Ya, Amirul Mu'mineen (Commander of the Faithful), by day my husband fasts and by night he is diligent in prayer, thus I feel inadequate to complain of him as he is engaged in the obedience of the Almighty."


Saiyidina Umar RA replied:

"What a pious man your husband is."


The complaining lady repeated her complaint.
In reply Saiyidina Umar RA repeated the same reply.


Ka'ab Asadi RA said unto Saiyidina Umar RA:

"Oh Commander of the Faithful, this lady is complaining of her husband due to the fact that her husband remains distant from her bed."


Saiyidina Umar RA replied:

"Just as you have understood her intentions, I feel you should resolve her problems."


Ka'ab RA then said to the lady:

"Beckon your husband to me."


Later then, the husband came forth.


Kaab RA said unto her husband:

"Your wife is complaining of you."

Her husband then asked whether if she was complaining of the shortage in food or drink (in their house).


Hazrat Ka'ab replied:

"No."


The lady then continued:

"Oh Chief Justice whose guidance is of great wisdom, his (my husband's) place of worship has busied him; my beloved (is away) from my chamber. Negligent is he unto my bed, the very works of his Ibadah. Hence, Oh Ka'ab make a decision, for he is indifferent be it day or night. His days and nights pass without sleep. Hence, I find he is not praiseworthy within womanly affairs."


The lady's husband replied:

"What has made me lose interest in sharing a bed within her bridal chamber, I am such who has been made to forget due to that which has been revealed. In the Surah An-Nahl (in the Qur'an) and seven other lengthily Surahs. Also the frightening, alarming Surahs of the Holy Qur'an."


Upon hearing the above Ka'ab RA ordered:

"Surely you have to fulfil her rights too. Her rights fall within four days for he who understands. Hence, leave your excuses and bestow her with her rights."

Ka'ab RA continues:

"Verily, Allah Ta'ala has allowed two, three or four woman (for a Muslim man to marry). Thus for you are three days and nights for Ibadah."


Having heard this excellent reply, Saiyidina Umar RA proclaimed (mafhum):

"I swear by Allah that I am confused as to whether the fact that you were able to instantly recognise the true intent of the complaining wife is more astounding or your flair and approach in resolving this matter - which is unknown to me. Be on your way, I announce you the Governor of Basrah as from today."