Learn To Take Care Of Your Children - 104

WHEN THE CHILD BEGINS TO TALK

The child should first be taught to say the Kalimah Shahadah when he /she begins to talk.

"Laa Ilaaha Illallah Muhammmadar Rasulullah."


EDUCATION AND GOOD MANNERS

Islam lays considerable emphasis on education and good character. It is the children's rightful claim to be given sound Islaamic education and taught good manners. This will not only afford the children happiness in both the worlds, but they will prove great assets to both, their families and society as well. This is why Rasoolullah sallallaahu-alayhi-wasallam declared good manners as the 'best thing' a father can impart to his children. He also declared the mother as the 'shepherdess' of the household which implies that she is responsible for the correct upbringing of her children.


WHAT PARENTS OWE THEIR CHILDREN

Education and Good Manners
Islam lays great emphasis on education and good character. It is the children's rightful claim to be given sound Islamic education and taught good manners. This will not only afford the children happiness in both - the world and the Hereafter, but they will prove great assets to both - their families and society as well. This is why Rasulullah SAW declared good manners as the best thing a father can impart to his children. He also declared the mother as the shepherdess of the household which implies that she is responsible for the correct upbringing of her children. Let it be known that this cannot be achieved if the mother is occupied with so-called professional obligations. To sacrifice the nurturing of good children at the expense of a "career" is lowly.

Self-Esteem
Parents owe their children personal worth and self-esteem which are the cornerstones for sound mental health. A child who is constantly criticised, looked down at, reproached, made to feel stupid and inept, continually compared with their brothers and sisters or cousins who do better; will become so unsure and so terrified that he or she will lose enthusiasm for learning and becoming successful.

Praising The Child and Expressing Love
A child needs to be praised every now and again for his achievements and good behaviour. Some parents find it difficult to voice their approval or praise the child. However, there are other modes of expressing approval as well, such as - a smile, a caress or a kiss will convey approval. All these acts of love are very essential for producing children who are healthy in mind and body. It is for this reason that our Shari'ah lays considerable stress on showing love and affection to children. Rasulullah SAW said that one who does not have mercy on our children and does not respect our elders, is not from among us.

Equality
Parents should always treat their children equitably. Children tend to grow miserable, lose confidence, become discouraged and resentful if parents show favouritism towards a particular child. It is related by Aishah RA - that once she offered a date to a lady beggar who was accompanied by her two daughters. The lady shared the date between her two daughters, depriving herself of a share. Then she departed. When Rasulullah SAW came home, she related to him the incident. The Prophet SAW said: "Whoever is involved (dealing in issues) with any daughters, and he treats them well (equitably), this will serve as a protection for him/her from the Fire."

Basic Islamic Education
It is the duty of every parent to ensure that his/her children have basic Islamic education which covers Aqaa'id or Islamic beliefs, the five principles of Islam, the rulings and Masaa'il pertaining to these five principles and the correct recital of the Holy Qur'an.

Standards and Values
Decent standards and solid values should also be taught to the child. This means being respectful to parents, elders, the Ulama, teachers and just laws.

Cleanliness and Other Necessary Precautions
The Shari'ah has termed cleanliness as half of Imaan. As such the mother should personally accomplish all maternal devotions such as feeding, bathing and keeping the child clean and in hygiene. Soiled clothes must be cleaned without delay so that there is no potential of disease and sickness spreading. In the availables of modern medical care, the child should also be immunised against infantile diseases. Never should any Muslim be tricked by the Shaytaan to think that getting an immunisation jab for the child means lack of faith and reliance in Allah. This is a deception which must be thrown away.